i can sing..i can move..i can see you in all i do

Worship Recap for February 12th , 2012

2012-02-12T12:03:00.000-05:00

Like A Lion (Daniel Bashta) link
-Welcome/Greeting
-Events & Opportunities
The Earth Is Yours (Gungor) link
Love Pours Down (Calling Out Closer) link
Show Me Your Glory (Jesus Culture) link - Renee Lead this

- Teaching - WEiRD- Relationships-

Great Is Thy Faithfulness (hymn)

Today was the first Sunday we unleashed the Lion, on Like a Lion.
I love this song.
I didn't have this song on my radar, but through preparing for another off-site worship night, I knew this would be a neat fit and transition out of another song.
As we practiced it... I fell in love with this song and fell in love with singing and playing it.
It has such an energy!

With this new series and doing some reorganizing, I really wanted to have the first song we played be upbeat and full of energy to really get the blood flowing. (oddly enough... I am completely scrapping this process for next week)

Links above link to the versions of the songs on iTunes that we adapted for our Gatherings.
I am again.... participating in "Sunday Setlists" at TheWorshipCommunity.com
Check out what other Worship Leaders are doing on the same Sunday.

Sunday Set Lists #186

Imogen Heap - Xizi She Knows

2012-02-10T15:23:00.001-05:00

Imogen Heap released a new song on the Chinese New Year.
This is it!

Josh Garrels - Love & War & the Sea In Between

2012-02-06T14:55:00.000-05:00

You should go download this album.

You can download it for free, from Josh.
[HERE]
You should then, sit down with a glass of wine or coffee and...
TURN IT UP!

You won't regret this.

Lent

2012-02-02T11:47:00.002-05:00

Lets not focus on the creepy picture.

Lent is fast approaching. (Feb 22nd to be exact)
Lent is a time to think through the upcoming events of the Easter season.
the 40 days is significant in that it was 40 days that Jesus fasted and was tempted as he prepared for his ministry.

Many churches celebrate the Lenten season and push their community to fast from one thing or many things throughout those forty days.
It all starts with Ash Wednesday where we are reminded, of our own mortality.
From dust we came and to dust we shall return. (hence the ashes on the forehead)
I struggle with how much to share and say, as it is not meant to brag... but to maybe help you think through some ideas or options for how you may prepare for Easter and the Lenten season.

Two years ago Hannah and I decided to observe Lent and pick something to fast from. We chose to Fast from meat for the 40 days. (kind of... some traditions allow for mini-easters/breaks. So on Sundays you can indulge in what you are Fasting from, as a mini-celebration and reminder that Easter is approaching)

This fast brought many things to light... such as how often I eat meat. How few healthy options there are for Vegetarians when eating out. (Kind of Prussia food court is a disaster for Veggies) It also made me take stock in what I put into my body. (that has since faded, unfortunately.)

I am starting to think through the upcoming season of Lent and what I need to relinquish to God. What is controlling me and my time? (this past Sunday's teaching on TiME was timely... as i had a small breakdown mid-week at work)

Again not to brag, but to get you thinking... here are some things I am struggling with and am thinking about removing from my life for 40 days.

Meat - again I think this was a wonderful practice... and would like to try it again.

Television - up until last March/April we only had TV via a crappy HD antenna. Now we have all the channels, HBO and a DVR that we sit in front of more than we should. I have chosen TV as the way to unwind, instead of time talking with my spouse, reading together or playing a game.
** the idea is to allow ourselves 1 hour of television or 1 movie a week.

Phone/Social Networking/ or my 2nd right hand- if you reading this... chances are you spend to much time on the computer (sorry it had to be said.) Why else would you be reading this except as a last resort of boredom.
the iPhone is great. I love it, but I'm on it way to much. I think even August realizes that... because as I pull it out he starts to whine. (not good)
I read an article yesterday about a Guy (Jake Reilly) who did a 90 days fast from computers, cell phones and all of this stuff.
This quote hit me, "If I sit and play Angry Birds for an hour a day, I don't look back and say "You know, I had a really great Angry Birds session three weeks ago. That was a really great time," but if I share a sunset walk on the beach with someone, that's a memory that I can treasure forever.I was and am convicted!
Don't get me wrong, i think tweeting about what I am eating or what I found up my nose is necessary!
I think pinning other peoples ideas, and feeling a sense pride when someone repins one of my pins (someone else idea) is Important.
And I think swinging the little stick figure from one tower to another for ultimate distance (Ropen'Fly2) is probably the best thing to happen to me all year, but maybe... just maybe... I need a break.

** the idea - once I enter the house is that I don't look at my phone until I go to bed. (Once I am in the door, i am allowed to answer phone calls, however, no texts. And I am allowed to check my phone once before my head hits the pillow.)
This will force me to have actually conversation with people if they text me. Or ignore them totally. Should be fun.

This wont be easy, but fasting isn't supposed to be easy. And easy things are usually not memorable nor do they make a last impact.

I hope you'll think through the upcoming Lenten season and think about what you feel God is pushing you to relinquish control of or to take a break from.
(maybe it is something you can all do as a family to start, you know start the tradition young)
Lets see where this take us.

Check out Jake who I mentioned above. - who dumped all social media, his cell phone an pretty much all electronic communication for 90 days! (the Amish Project)
Be inspired!
CNN Interview
Yahoo News Story
Forbes Write Up

SH*TUFF CHRISTIAN GIRLS SAY

2012-02-01T13:51:00.001-05:00

maybe you have been hiding under a rock... and are not aware of the highly popular

S*&^T _____ say videos. (where people pick a a group of people and say everything stereotypical of that type of person. They are funny, offensive and spot on!

anyway, I just happened across a new one called,

SH*TUFF CHRISTIAN GIRLS SAY.

Enjoy.

Worship Recap for Jan 29th

2012-01-30T13:51:00.000-05:00

Awake My Soul (Mumford & Sons) Link-Welcome
-E&O's
All Creatures (hymn) Link
That Where I Am (Rich Mullins) Link
His Love Is For Us All (Robbie Seay) Link *actual title Rich & Poor (album just released)
-Teaching: WEiRD TiME
Oh Great God, Give Us Rest (Crowder) Link

Mixed reviews on the Mumford and Sons song, mostly positive, but I did get a negative... but that always happens when you do something different, a little strange or "edgy." (i'm used to this by now)

the New series we are in is... spot on. Yesterday was very convicting and helped sure up some thoughts for Hannah and I and something we have been thinking through for the Lenten season.

Links are behind the song titles, link to iTunes where you can purchase the songs.

Scary picture of the day!

2012-01-26T08:03:00.001-05:00

Found this one via facebook, it's a little creepy.
I mean I get it, but....

Girl Scout Cookies Are the Devil

2012-01-25T09:43:00.001-05:00

It's that time of the year.
The time when these cute little girls with their pig-tails, missing teeth, big eyes, cute smiles and ferocious sales tactics come out.

I loathe this time of the year.

It's January 25th, my well planned and laid out year of the slimmer, trimmer Kurt is in full swing. (ok, pretend it is) 25 days into this resolution and these little munchkins start to appear to derail my "Shake-weight Successful Ab-orama"(TM) work out plan!

How did these cookies get so popular?
They are crazy expensive, mass produced cookies. (and you only get 10 in a box)
I don't get it. Are they that good or have we been scared into eating them and thinking they are that good?

I hate going to the store period... but this time of the year I get downright scared.
They have their little table set up at the entrance/exit and i swear they raise the squeakiness level on their voice. (like turning the amp up to 11, but instead it says, extra cute and squeaky)

I walk in and avoid eye contact.
I get my half gallon of milk, and maybe something else that I have been sent to get.
While I am checking out, my mind is going through all the excuses I can think of to get out of here without cookies.
my receipt prints. (panic starts to set in)
I walk toward the door, oh crap... there are moms with the girls. Double Crap! That one mom is bigger then me, oh she could wreck me... my head is like a zit to her... What do I do, what do i say... oh no, the doors are opening.

*Cue the cute squeaky voice, with eyelashes batting!*

"Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?"

uh... uh... (uh oh, the large mother is start to glare) um, well you see I have this Shake weight and weight loss pla.....

"they are to help support our girl scout troop, and keep the gyms of america full for another month!"

Wait, what? (did her voice drop into a lower register and did she step a lot closer)

"If you don't buy them our troop will have to live on the street, and I'll be sad... do you want my troop to be homeless and me to be sad?"

Wait... did you just say... homeless... (I swear she stepped closer, are her eyes glowing?)

"See my mother? (i nod, mouth hanging open) She thinks you should buy some cookies!"

(i nod furiously)

So whats your favorite kind and how many boxes would you like? (back in the cute squeaky voice)

They now accept Credit Cards... Excellent!?

Jesus Hates Klingons

2012-01-24T14:30:00.000-05:00

Confession.

I watched Star Trek growing up.

And I still occasionally turn on a great episode of the Next Generation when it is on Spike.

However, this leaves me speechless and slightly offended.

Found at : the American Jesus

Recap of Worship: Jan 22nd

2012-01-23T12:59:00.000-05:00

This date kicked off the start of a new series: WEiRD (based off of Craig Groeschel's book of the same name.

It has been several years since we as a church really pushed and encouraged people within the community to invite their neighbors and friends for a specific series. This is that series.
We have talked about, talked through and been planning this for months, and it still seemed to sneak up on us.

So what do we do to adjust worship based off of this series?
or
Do we change or adjust?

My goal was to pick some specific upbeat songs, that were a little different or... wait for it.... WEIRD. (had to sorry)

Filled With Your Glory (Starfield) link
-E & O's
Come On (My Soul) (Rend Collective) link
God Is So Good (Dr. Mtika Version)
- Welcome Time in middle of the song
-Choir Teaching Part
Beautiful (Phil Wickham) link
Teaching
Beautiful (v3 & v4)

I felt God lay these song on my heart, and think they fit what i was hoping for and fit where God wanted to take us.

*new feature I provided a link to itunes in case you want to purchase the song, or see who's version we played, or tried to play.

This is a song that I'm making up....

2012-01-21T22:30:00.000-05:00

So going back... back to the JOY event (i blogged about here) We needed to fill sometime, as the magician we wanted couldn't come, Dr. Bubbles was busy and we had about 15 minutes to kill. I decided earlier that week, I was going to need to fill that time. I then forgot about that time... and remembered the day of... so... during the event I snuck away for 10 mins and wrote an outline for a song. I knew I wanted to do a MadLibs type thing and make up a song on the spot.... but I didn't trust myself entirely. (sometimes my made up songs take bad turns) So I outlined the song below... and all the underlined words are words, kids called out and I filled in.

Here is how it went. Title: This is a song that I'm making up!

This is a song that I’m making up...
I've never really played it before
This is a song, that I’m making up.
It probably isnt very good. (see it doesn't even rhyme)

I once had a minion
it wasnt very cute.
I took it with me to bed.
When I woke up the minion was gone.... I had to look everywhere.

When I found it it was hiding in the toilet
that seems strange.
But I grabbed that minion
and said..... Yatzee!
and made it come back home.

This is a song that I’m making up...
Ive never really played it before
This is a song, that I’m making up.
It probably isnt very good. (see it doesnt even rhyme)

So I have this guitar, it’s name is Frank

I play it every day.
I write songs, for others to hear..... in hopes that they like me.(Do you Like me?)

The other day I wrote a song called, Eat My Potato Chips
it was about Love
I sang it and played until I couldnt sing.
Then I played it again. This is a song that I’m making up...
I've never really played it before
This is a song, that I’m making up.
It probably isnt very good. (see it doesn't even rhyme)

Sing random words.
**Which I no longer remember, but included these words:
Rat, Cat, Snicker Doodle

This is a song that I’m making up...
Ive never really played it before
This is a song, that I’m making up.
It probably isnt very good. (see it still doesn't rhyme)

The Purity Bear

2012-01-20T10:31:00.000-05:00

So I found this at Jesus Needs New PR/Matthew Paul Turner's website.

and what he wrote is just to good, to not post.

O. So the cute teddy bear helped him abstain from sex with his girlfriend until marriage.
And that's awesome!
But I would love to see what kind of shape Teddy was in on the couples wedding day.
And i wonder if it's considering pressing charges.
Ha ha ha ha

Enjoy.

notice the last scene... how they look the same age.
I think they got married two weeks later.

When Singing In Church Goes WRONG!

2012-01-18T13:22:00.001-05:00

This is awesome
(gotta watch the whole thing)

Found at: The American Jesus

Planning Out a Practice

2012-01-17T11:25:00.002-05:00

This is a boring post for all of you non music people.

I apologize in advance.

During my brief stint as a Music Major @ Eastern University I took some fun and very good classes about becoming a Worship Leader.

(that was what I originally went to school for, then I read a book and plans got hijacked)

One of the classes what pretty practical about music and rehearsals. I didn't think much of it at the time, but one of the smartest things said was when you go into a practice with vocalists or a band- have a plan.
Duh!

But isn't the plan... practice the music how you want it to sound.
You know... run through all the songs and then your good.

I cringe at what I am about to say....
Yes, on most Sundays that is unfortunately the plan.
Due to the limited amount of time we have... but as I am making more time to practice for special events and such, I am realizing the need to PLAN.

This week I have a practice... and instead of trying to conquer the 8-10 songs... which is unrealistic when several are brand new... I am only trying to attack 4.
(sometimes you try to attack to many and everyone gets overwhelmed when you took 1 hour on one and you feel like you have 9 left)

3 are new.
1 is a very simple, easy new song... Just me a guitar and some background vocals.
the other 2 are quite intricate... and I know will take most of our time.
Very specific guitar parts, layers. There are break downs, fade outs, driving bass parts etc.
Should be fun.

the other we will practice in the middle (because we will need something a bit easier) is a old familiar tune but with a new twist on these additional vocal parts.
Which we will spend some time on, but I know will be pretty easy to figure out.
*sidenote* I prefer small vocal groups. (ie... me and one other vocalist... with an occasional 3rd) With more than that you really need to have a vocal practice to nail parts.
The other part is for layering, structure and arrangement, you do not need all the vocalist to be singing all the time. When you are working with 3 -4 vocalist in addition to your lead, it feels odd saying... no don't sing here, just stand here for part of the song.

Also with the World Wide Internet Machines at our disposal almost all the songs you are going to practice are online. Think a head... and send them out to your team to listen to, sing along with, practice with or deconstruct parts and where to come in.

This now concludes the most boring post I have ever written.

To make it slightly more entertaining... here are some great videos of kids trying to be cool and flip their guitars/basses.

We now know who to vote for!

2012-01-17T11:23:00.003-05:00

Politics are a sticky topic.

They really ignite people, more than anything else. (maybe even religion)

I used to be very political and love to argue. (i think it is a part of most young 20 somethings know it all phase.)

I lost HOPE since the last election and much of what Shane Claiborne had written in his book Jesus for President held even more true.

We are now in an election year and it has been hot for over a year now.

It has been back and forth the Republican debates have been going on for what seems like since last election.

I haven't known who to vote for... its been so confusing... and since I don't like to do any research... and also I believe everything I see on TV, you could understand my issues.

Well those issues are no more.

Various Evangelical Conservatives (including Dr. Dobson and Focus on the Family) have decided to support a candidate, my mind has now been made up for me! (thank God)

RICK SANTORUM FOR PRESIDENT!

The Article

What I enjoy about the article is how it mentions they had several rounds of voting.
(reading into it: meaning they all voted for different people and had no consensus(meaning they don't really want any of them) ... so they just kept voting and eliminating people until someone one) This sounds like the general election.

I'll get more political soon, but I'll let this one sink in.

The Unbelievable Believers: Blessed Sounds

2012-01-05T10:50:00.003-05:00

Let me state right away, I didn't come across this. I cannot take any credit for this.
I found this at the American Jesus (dot) net
This one is a winner folks.

supposedly these were compiled for this purpose of sharing with the world some demos from Christian artists that never made it onto an album. (oh darn)

I'll post two of my faves.

Jesus is 'Bout To 'Rap' This Up
(please listen through the end... the end is exactly what you would want)

Safe Sex Is Just A Fantasy

this one kills me... very graphic.
No... no, very very graphic...

Enjoy these gems.

Worship Recap for January 1st 2012

2012-01-02T13:05:00.000-05:00

Playing a bit of catch up and pulling a Jon Acuff, by posting a bunch of blogs all at once.
New Years Day feels like a long time ago.

I wanted to pick some songs that went well thinking about the year that lay ahead.
As Epiphany had yet to happen I threw in a Christmas song!

I also wanted some time to reflect and be quiet and prepare for the year so we had a few minutes of silence.

Go Tell It On the Mountain
We Will Glorify
Hallelujah, What A Savior

-Welcome Time
- E & O's

Time to Share

the Lords Table Intro
Doxology
Time of Silence
Eat & Drink
Amazing Grace

2011 albums of the year

2011-12-31T10:48:00.000-05:00

last year was the first year I actually sat down and thought through the Music I had listened to and connected with.
i feel all the music I listen to impacts me and effects the way I play, write and listen to music.
last year I explained why I chose the albums I picked.
(you can check out Last Years post here)

the main factor for the album I picked is... replay-ability.
there are albums that over the course of the year I have listened to over and over again, without tiring of them.
some of them I have listened to, let them breath and then gone back to them after a month or two and it has solidified my thinking that, yes, this is a great album.

so without further delay... here are my picks for the years best music:
(in no order)

Mat Kearney - Young Love

i stumbled upon Mat Kearney's new album - Young Love by accident. I have known about Mat for a few years, but have never stayed current.
i was on the wonderful blog Jesus Needs New PR and
Matthew Paul Turner posted Mat's new music video for the first single off the album,

Hey Mama

and I dug it.
i actually also thought Hannah might like it and be able to use it for one of her dance classes, so I went home and downloaded it.

Young Love proved to be a great pick and it chocked full of wonderful stories in Mat's spoken word delivery, with very catchy hooks that implant themselves on your brain all day. Very open, very honest and very diverse.

Gungor - Ghost Upon the Earth

if you are a friend of mine in day-to-day life or on facebook you could have guessed this
album would be on here.
where to start.... my anticipation for this album was probably a bit unhealthy.
my wife was tired of me talking about it.
then once it came out, she tired of me going on and on about it.
two things then happened...
i calmed down, she finally listened to it, and started to realize why I was obsessive.
Flash Forward Two Months
she sees gungor live for the first time,
it was a stripped down simple 3 person acoustic set.
(this is a taste of what we saw)
she now completely gets it.

this is an album that i have shared with all sorts of friends in and out of church who
appreciate music and they have all been floored by it.
it is one of the best albums I have ever listened to.

and while I hate labeling... I think one of the best if not the best album Christian Music has ever been blessed with.
strong words... I know... but it is time for good music inside the bubble.
gungor also put out a ebook with the album where they go through an explain each song and the story behind the album.
of all of the albums I will list here... this one is the one I will tell you to spend money on, over all the others.
*this is not an album to bump around the house to on first and second listen.

You need to sit down and just listen.

You may scoff at me, but everyone I have talked to has started to listen to it and realized that then restarted it at an appropriate time.

Seryn - This Is Where We Are

this band was on my radar for a few months, before the album came out.Then I forgot about them, then someone blogged about them again and... back on the radar and here to stay.

this is one of those candle-lit albums that just makes you happy you are alone and with a good set of speakers.

the Harmonies are chilling, the various instrumentation perfectly placed.

To say it is a quiet album, would be wrong...

but it is one I love to listen and be present with.

It makes me want to learn more instruments.

the three above came very easy to me and I knew they needed to be on this list.

After this point I have really struggled.

there have been a ton of GREAT albums that have come out, but I am not wanting great.... I am talking top albums of the YEAR.

Lupe Fiasco - Lasers

**NOTICE THE PARENTAL ADVISORY WARNING**

(this is not for the faint of heart)

I am a big Lupe Fiasco fan and this album has been a long time coming.

delayed, pushed back, not ever going to release and finally... it came.

lupe doesn't miss a beat, the production is tight and what he is writing and the stories he is sharing... honest and real.

the man is good at what he does and in stead of rapping all about fame,fortune and women... he is taking on the gov't, hypocrites, radio stations and life in general.

if you like a little hip-hop in your life this is one to get.

it seems I cannot come up with a 5th must have, best album of the year.

maybe I need to broaden my horizons... and i am sure many of you will be able to suggest something i missed... but above are my honest to goodness likes of the year.

Honorable Mentions

the Civil Wars - Barton Hollow

i first saw this duet perform in Waco, Texas last year at the Crowder Conference.

their live performance blew me away.

their harmonies and chemistry was nd still are... simply astonishing.

Jesus Culture - Come Away
ok, so I have played this one a lot this year, but only certain songs.
It is a worthwhile album, but not all of the tracks do it for me.
Songs like 'You are My Passion' and 'Show Me Your Glory' are excellent.

and I think provide great steps for church music to latch onto.

Paul Simon - So Beautiful or So What

so Paul Simon, a legend, but I have never really gotten into his music

i happened to watch an SNL this year(which is rare) and Paul was the musical guest
he played the song Rewrite and this song blew me away.

i had to go get the album and it has been a favorite this year.

one I need to re-listen to now!

can't wait to see what 2012 has in store for music... I dont think we will be disapointed

the holiday in pictures

2011-12-29T09:33:00.000-05:00

this was August's first Christmas.
Hannah and I decided to keep the gifting to him small and simple.
(knowing the grandparents, aunts and uncles would give him more than enough)
Here are a few snapshot of happenings over the holiday.

unwrapping his present from Mom and Dad!
See & Say

uncle kevin thought a full sized drum set was appropriate for his 10month old nephew

notice the size of the drum set and the size of August.
though he seems to love it!

get this thing off my head!!!
I can't reach it!

gift exchange, justin got me a pleasure chest of beer from Nashville's own
Yazoo Brewing Co.

family sing-a-longs
(including, two guitars, an acoustic bass, a violin, and a mandolin.)
i forgot the melodica!

beard baby!
(thanks aunt kristin)

the spoils
(only a few)

it seems it all happened so quickly.
but thankfully we got to just step back, breathe and enjoy it for a few days.

if I were to write a book

2011-12-23T13:00:00.000-05:00

I've always thought it would be cool to write a book.

I have a lot of thoughts and maybe someone would want to read them.

I think mostly I want my picture on the inside cover of a book and my parents to be proud of me.

I mean think about it, if I would die tomorrow... memories are great, but to have a book of inane things I wrote on people shelves would feel pretty good.
(yes I realize the shallowness of this... I'm not perfect)

On Sunday night I ended up in our local mall to get my new phone working properly and I had 30minutes to kill, so after amazingly finishing all my Christmas shopping for my wife,

I started to wonder the mall like when I was 15. (except with more facial hair)
I wondered into the bookstore and headed back towards the religious section...

I started to peruse the shelves. (all 4 of them)
There were sooooo many religious books.
Blue Like Jazz, How to Eat like the Bible and Live, 10 ways to pray,Love Wins, the Jabez Prayer, Heaven is for REAL, Every day a Friday and the list goes on and on.

I started to think through... what would I write that hasn't already been written.
I am betting that most of these books in the religion section are pulling pieces of scripture and adapting said verses to what that author believes or is trying to make a point about and then telling us that maybe this will work for you.
or even some are bold enough to say... this will work for you.

(the smile says... this will work for you)

I noticed a bunch of books I had already read and several that actually sounded interesting that I would want to add to my list.
then I thought... well currently I am slowly reading two books, so no need to add anything for right now.

I left without purchasing anything... amazed at all the titles I had seen.

As I walked back to the Sprint store I continued to think about what would I write if someone said, hey... here is a book deal... write something.
I realized... there really isn't much that is new or unique for me to say.
Lets be real, ultimately most of these books in the religious section are writing about the Christian life and how we need to try to live it better.
They then give ideas, thoughts or steps on how to do that, drop in some scripture, a nice quote from another christian author on the cover and... BAM!
we fawn over these books.

I then realized that I am more likely to read several books about the Bible and living and as a follower of Jesus than actually picking up the Bible.
I may be alone in this, but highly doubt it based off of the amount of books I saw.
How is it we would rather read what someone else thinks and wrote about the Bible than actually picking the thing up and reading it for ourselves.

I need to re-shift my focus.
I need to be reading His words, rather than someone else's words about His words.

the JOY event

2011-12-21T09:30:00.000-05:00

This past weekend was our churches BIG bring in the Holiday season event, called

JOY

The event had all sorts of things happening.

We had live music from Calling Out Closer

and

Jeremy Simon.

We had a small kids quartet from New Covenant church in Norristown.

We had dances from Feet First Dance, in Phoenixville, and from our very own Valley View girls.

I performed a song I pretty much made up on the spot.

There were crafts for the kids, facepainting, spin art and a photo booth.

We sang carols, lit a HUGE tree and served a lot of cookies, popcorn, hot dogs and baked beans.
Over 400 hot dogs to be precise.

We ran out of parking spaces and we estimated anywhere between 800 and 900 people came through that night.

What an event!

There were countless hours and hours of planning to pull something off like this.
And all the planning in the world still had me running around like a complete nut job the whole night.
This event has really consumed much of my life over the last two months, with emailing, planning, contacting, planning, setting up acts, planning organizing and of course... planning.
And I was only 1 of 4 people working on all of this.

It was a HUGE success!
I believe a few people attended our gatherings the day after because of the event.

I think the Christmas spirit was alive and well.
And what more could we ask for.
Thanks to everyone who volunteered at the event to make it look flawless.

have a JOYful week

Beloved

2011-12-19T11:30:00.000-05:00

Beloved

There are no nights now when I don't dream and wake in thedarkness
to find I've been weeping.
But it has beenages since I've cried while awake,
'cause centuries wear on the heart,they erode it away.
I'm still trying torecord each word You spoke
and if I finish I'll fill up this earth,
but the memory ofYour voice leaves me empty,
'cause I've been banished and boiledalive and yet I remain
and they still call me by name,
but they don't say it the same.

I watched all mybrothers become martyrs and die one at a time,

but I often wonder if waiting forYou is the harder sacrifice.

and I'm stilltrying to record each word You spoke

and if I finish I'll fill up thisearth, but the memory of Your voice

leaves me empty.

I may be feeble andbarely alive, but I've yet to forget a single word that You said.

If my voice breaks down and all of my strengthgives out

and I'm just a shell left breathingmy last days out.

(let it be known)

That time is a thief who surely steals everything,

but in my case it just cleared outthe waste for me.

Nothing has dimmed; You have simply eclipsed all that stoodin the way.

I'd give 20 morelifetimes; it would all be the same.

In the end, I knowI'll find…

You will come once again.

You'll come call meby name.

Listen to it here ...

100

2011-12-17T23:30:00.000-05:00

People make a BIG deal about the 100th post.

How do I encapsulate all these thoughts and feelings to ALL my readers.

(all 10 of you)

It's too much pressure.

So... in rare form... I am posting a very short post.

If you haven't read all 100 posts, start at the beginning and... on second thought...

go play with your kids or be with your loved one.
That's probably way more important than anything I wrote.

but thanks to those who do read

Blessed

2011-12-16T15:00:00.000-05:00

So this old hymn worked it's way into my head today.
All about Counting your blessings.
I realize I often times write sad things or deep things.
Or I write things I am struggling with... and this is a reflection of my self obsessed nature.
It's all about ME!

but as I sit at my nice desk... staring at pictures of my nice family I realize I do not count my blessing enough nor do I ever share with others how blessed I am.
This sharing is not meant to tout that I am better than anyone or have more stuff... but to hopefully make us all pause and reflect on the amazing things we have and often times take for granted.

(in no particular order)

My Health
i am rarely sick... and while I was effected by cancer at a young age, it has never returned.

My Rugged Good Looks
many will laugh, but there must be something to them, as I landed a smoking hot wife... and my jokes aren't that good. plus I did some stupid stuff when younger with fireworks & flames... so I'm glad I look somewhat decent

My Wife
as mentioned above... most mornings I wake up and do NOT understand how I got so lucky.

she is a looker! she is a cooker! she has an amazing heart, she has more patience than the freaking pope, is frighteningly creative and constantly is the encouragement I need day in and day out.

August

i heard people yammer on for years about how having a child changes you and changes the way you view the world and blah blah blah.
Shocker... they were all right.
August was not planned and unexpected and when we first found out I almost curled into the fetal position worrying about everything that was not ready for him to come in 9months.
I would NOT change ANYTHING!
These last 41 weeks have been some of the best of my life. I love my wife more after seeing her with him, I love him more than I knew I could love anything. His curiosity is so draining at times... but so exciting.
And when I come in the door and he stops dead, and smiles wide... then army crawls towards me...
it's over.

My Job
I have a 9-5 (well actually a 7:30-4) and like everyone else I complain often about this or that... but the fact is I like the people I work with. I like what I do. And I have a job... which right now is nothing to complain about.

this job allowed us to buy a house, and provide a smoke free environment for my family.

My House

some days being a home-owner sucks. Like when you have plumbing issues multiple times.
Or when your pipes freeze.

But when everything is going well, you are warm, the tree is decorated and it feels like your home.

it is amazing.
The story of how we got this house and the things the seller took care for us are downright miraculous.

My Car
it isn't pretty to look at, it makes some crazy noises... that cause my car-pool body to cry out to God... but the thing gets 32mph in town, 42mph highway and gets me here and there... with minimal problems.

and it came with a kick-ass sound system. (perfect for the avid music listener)

My Family (the focht's)
my mom and dad are... well my mom and dad. and we all have are qualms with our parents and how the raised us... but I am so thankful for God-fearing parents that let me be me, be a little crazy, have crazy friends.
That opened their home up for band practices, sleepovers, pool parties, hangouts the list goes on.
some how they did a fine job and I turned out pretty good. I have never been arrested, in court (for me), didn't drink til I was 21, have never smoked anything... and Love Jesus.
(to top it off, I am not incredibly socially awkward, considering i was home-schooled K-8thgrade)

my brother is rad too. he put up with a lot of really ignorant crap growing up. I did some terrible things.
he still talks to me!

Her Family (the nolan's)
my in-laws are great. we get along wonderfully and they love me for me, quirks, loud mouth and sometimes extreme openness. They have helped us out in times of struggle. Blessed us with vacations, and meals.

they baby sit for us, they love me and tell me how lucky they are for me to have come along into hannah's life. I mean... that alone is one of the nicest things i have ever been told.
her sister loves our son so much and would do anything for hannah or august. (I think me too... but I think I can still take her off guard) You couldn't ask for a better sister-in-law (she's my fave)
my bro-in-law - is always available to help me dig something move something, destroy something or play bass.
umm... perfect in my book.

My Church
we came across our church via friends who no longer attend.

we went a few times in college, but it just didn't feel right.

the second sunday after we were married, we went to Valley View and have been there ever since.

if you would have told me 4 1/2 years ago I would end up as part time staff leading worship... wouldn't have believed you... although most of what i have written I would not have believed 4 1/2 years ago.
Valley View has been such a good thing for us... a perfect fit... no... because churches are made up of imperfect people... so by association... can never be perfect.
Full of grace, yes. Understanding, yes. Challenging, yes. Where we are supposed to be, yes!

My Friends
i am not sure if everyone's friends seem to change as much as mine do, but... i am thankful for all of them.
my boys growing up (Dan and John) were always fun, fresh and a little bit nuts. (since 2nd grade baby!)
the three of us were inseparable at church... there are tons of great memories I have... and I realize they help shaped who I am today.
my other friends at church... too many to name... gave me great people who encouraged me, pick on me when needed and who i enjoyed being with.
my high school friends... (megan, jesse, john and dan) you guys allowed me to be me and different, dress odd and never feel pressured to do something I was not comfortable with that ultimately would have gotten us in trouble. I didn't do many of the things teenagers do because we all agreed to not do them.

Those are the things I currently want to share with how blessed I am, the list goes on... but you get the drift.

What are you thankful for... or do you count as blessing?

confession - status symbols and looking cool

2011-12-14T13:20:00.000-05:00

so on Sunday I came home from church, ate lunch and fell asleep on the couch.

It was glorious.

Sundays drain me more than a normal work day!

When I awoke from my slumber my android smart phone was not working.

the touch screen had grown tired of being touched and just didn't respond.
I always thought I treated it well, I told it I like it, that it made my life easier and what a great deal it was. But these things must not have been enough.
I called T-Mobile and as always they were very helpful and troubleshot some things for me and determined...
!!!!pfffttt!!!! it was dead
so they would be sending me a phone, that would arrive late Tuesday.

I thought to myself... that sucks... I wont have a phone for two and half days... uggh...
but ...you know what maybe this will be a good thing for me.
Not connected for a little while, not always responding to emails, checking tweets.
No problem.

I then realized, my car makes funny noises, I am not carpooling this week and if something were to go wrong, this would be the time.

so I called my mother and asked to borrow and old POS phone.
she had her old one laying around...
i could now make and receive calls and that's all I needed.

(picture is enlarged to make you think it is way bigger than it is!)
((that sounds dirty))

{enter shallow self}

so it turns our I am quite vain.
Over the next two days... if I had to use my phone I made a point of telling everyone that saw me use it, that my REAL phone was busted and I had to borrow this clunker
with the tag line...
"better to have something in case of emergency than nothing"

My real issue came was when I was in public with it,
in my office building or somewhere else.
In my head I am saying... I bet someone is saying... look at that guys phone.
What year is this.
Did he borrow that from his mom?

(Irony!)
(because it is ok for Moms to have these phones)
Look at the size of that thing!
Does he eat hotpockets for dinner?

Then I felt convicted.
How shallow am I, that I care what someone thinks about my phone.
I used to be that weird guy who didn't care what other people thought,
Spiked hair, bright blonde or midnight black.
suspenders, high socks with shorts, or pink shirts, wearing chucks before they were cool again.
No chain store clothes... all punk rawk, dickies and off brands.

How did this happen?
When did this switch come that I wear those things and am jealous of other peoples phones... and embarrassed by mine?

How confused are my priorities that I am so willing to share why I have this ghetto phone, but wont share the Love of God with my co-workers?

Jesus for President 2012 (the video)

2011-12-14T09:44:00.005-05:00

Christian radicals Shane Claiborne and Chris Haw wrote a book prior to the 2008 election, called Jesus For President. (very good read)

This is a fun animated video different from their approach, but well worth watching.
(it picks fun at Republicans... but let be honest... both sides are pretty messed up and confused)

Found At: the American Jesus

tis the season

2011-12-12T09:43:00.002-05:00

sigh

i'm tired

why do we do this again

how do i not do this again next year

o come o come emmanuel

and ransom captive my soul from all of this, that seems so wrong

Can you make Racism funny? (I try)

2011-12-06T15:54:00.001-05:00

I read this "board" everyday that our local paper puts out online.
It is mostly full of whiners and people complaining about every little thing or you get you occasional racists... but occasionally you get a gem.
The one below was not a gem, very ignorant and upsetting... but I spun it around and tried to make light of it in my response.
Because the post was sooo far off base and other people were berating this person back, I wanted to go a different way.
I hope you enjoy my response.

Original Poster:
Recently I was in the doctors office and in walks an Arab woman all dressed in black from head to toe. You could only see her eyes. She talked to the receptionist and left. That was a little scary. Why if they are in America can't they at least dress like we do or go back to where they came from?

My Response:
"so the other day I saw this Canadian wearing a Red Velvet Suit, sporting a matching hat, and a LONNNGGG white beard.
He sat on this chair and people PAID to get a picture with him.
And his eyes... i am telling you they freaking twinkled. TWINKLED I TELL YOU!
talk about scary.
I've never seen my own eyes twinkle.

Don't even get me started on his belly that shook like jelly when he laughed.
We need to notify someone... FAST!!!

Not fit to lead?

2011-12-02T10:20:00.000-05:00

I wrote the below earlier this week and have been going back and forth with posting it. But I need to be honest with myself and post this so people can keep me in check.
Maybe you can say a prayer or two as well.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s not your job to get themexcited.
It’s not your job to sing aperfect melody.
It’s not your job to makethem all love you.
It’s not your job to praythe perfect prayer.
It’s not your job to writethe perfect worship song.

It’s not your job to preacha mini sermon.

It’s not your job to havethe best looking guitar.

It’s not your job to looklike Nathan Finochio.

It’s not your job to makeall the hands go up.

It’s not your job to singthat cover song.

It’s not your job to connectthe sermon to the music.

It’s not your job to getthem to put down their coffee cups.

It’s not your job to makethem into worshipers.

It’s your job to worshipGod with every facet of your life Monday – Sunday.

When that happens…

All of the above may follow.Or may not. But you will actually have the credibility to be called a“worship leader”.

- written by Carlos Whittaker

I read this last week and it has been nagging me since then.

Hannah had to go to a dance practice last night so it was Daddy and August time.

These times are special yet often times frightening, me completely and solely responsible for this little human.

They are also very special and a great time to bond.
I was holding him last night as he was getting sleepy, so his head was sunken into my neck. And as I held him I whispered to him,

"I love you so much, I don't think anyone understands how much that is."

At that moment, what Carlos had written came crashing through my brain."It’s your job to worship God with every facet of your life Monday – Sunday."

I realized I love music and I love worship music.
I love leading worship and creating a space for others to worship.

(All good things)
However, I think over time I have fallen out of love with God.

My life is consumed with many things...

and one of the major things that consumes my time is church.

In thinking back... I have never been so connected and involved with a church.
I am a part time staff member (about 10-15 hours a week), I am on the leadership team,
and I chat, tweet, facebook, text or email people from church at various times throughout the day.
(Again... all good things)

But all of these things are simply that... things and distractions from the ultimate reasons I am or should be involved in the church.

GOD

I have slowly been filling up my time with things that I think will help others connect with God.
While simply not connecting with him myself.
Amos Chapter 5 comes to mind :
"I hate all your pretense -- the hypocrisy of your religious festivals and solemn assemblies!"

Have I made my life into a show?
Of "good" things that "help" others... but are brimming with hypocrisy?

I dislike the word hypocrisy.
And I am very careful, to try to not be that... to the point of tailoring what I say... or don't say so I can not be called one.
But here is the rub.
As I write all of this the conviction I feel is based off of leading others... while not actually feeling at all convicted about not wanting to have a deeper relationship with Christ.

This scares me.
This concerns me.
This truly makes me question my involvement in my church.

Handel's Messiah Accident (or why Valley View will never do this!)

2011-12-02T10:02:00.001-05:00

Just watch
Cover your childs eyes!

Found at: The American Jesus

Jesus Loves Barbershop Quartets.

2011-12-01T09:52:00.001-05:00

I couldn't not post this.
My one big take away is....
How short is that one guy... or how tall are the other three?
WOW

Found at: the American Jesus

Worship Recap - for Sunday, November 17th, 2011

2011-11-29T10:12:00.001-05:00

Theme: Hope

Come and Worship (Angels from the Realms of Glory) - Bebo Norman

In Christ Alone - Hymn

My Hope Is You - Third Day
O Come O Come Emmanuel - Traditional (arr. by Kurt Focht)

- Welcome -

- Baby Dedication-

-E & O/Announcements-

Teaching: Advent - Hope

My Hope Is You - Third Day

I went after songs that centered around the theme of Hope.
I figured there are two thought processes behind hope at this time.
Hope - of a Savior. (coming to save Israels people!)
Hope - because we know the ending and what is coming.

I took on doing a slight rearranging of the carol O Come O Come Emmanuel.
The chords were pretty much traditional, but I added some changes to the chorus/refrain to make it a little more modern and reflective.

I had a full band again, which is just wonderful.
Drums, Bongos/Dejembe, Bass, Electric Guitar, Acoustic Guitar, Bells/Glockenspiel,

other percussion, and tfour vocalists.
This is a great time of the year to really bring a big sound and add what seem like minor things (like jingle bells) but add so much!

Kind of bummed I am not on next week as we moved some themes around, and next week is JOY, but... my wife and child will appreciate me being home.

Five Iron Frenzy... is back!

2011-11-23T10:25:00.001-05:00

On November 22nd, 2003... I stood in a crowd of over 4000 people in the Fillmore Auditorium, in Denver Colorado, watching a milestone in my life come to an end.

I had flown over 1700 miles to watch my favorite band of all time play their last show.

I had spent the earlier part of the day in a tiny 2 bedroom apartment with various equally crazy fans from various cities, states and countries.

Some were from Texas, Oklahoma, Florida, and England. (yes the country)

This band had made a serious impact on not just me, but clearly thousands of others that people would choose to travel that far.

It was a small blizzard that night which added to the magic feeling as several of us navigated the Denver Public Transportation system to get downtown for the sold out show.

I remember them playing a fabulous show and dreading the ending, but also longing for it to come, to experience what it felt like.

the Live recording of it, does not do justice to what it felt like being there, but will give you a slight glimpse. (example... the thanks you chanting at the end was way longer in then on the recording)

that night and show was perfect.

the next day we headed to a random coffee shop that the band had taken over for a few hours to chat with fans and say proper good-byes and thank yous.

I remember watching the lines of people, waiting to talk to the different band members.

I remember talking to my friend Dennis afterward... who had a huge line the entire time and him just being in awe of the people that came and waited in line to just say thanks and share the impact the band had on their lives.

here is something I wrote a few months back about this band.

you can read the whole post here

I remember the first time I saw FIF live and had no idea who they were... lead singer Reese Roper was wearing a full cow costume (with udders). Why?? (You'll have to ask him) Five Iron made a very large impact on my lifethat resulted in me seeing them live over 25times... and me actually becoming friends with one of the members.

(Seeing their final concert in Denver, Colorado at age 19 is a night that I'll cherish forever.) Their music definitely inspired me and let me know it was ok to be a nerd or different and I shouldn't care what other people think.

Yesterday marked 8 years since their final show.

At 7pm last night (Mountain time... the time their final show started) they made an announcement.

Five Iron Frenzy is back!!!

They had recorded a brand new song, and wanted to make a brand new album...

but to do that they needed our help and started a kickstarter project to raise money to support their recording.
They needed to raise $30,000 by Jan 21st or they wouldn't be able to record and would lose all the money.
They gave various incentives for pledging certain amounts.

Within the first hour the announcement was made and the pledging started... they had raised over $40,000!
(safe to say their fans want them back)
As of 12:57am their kickstarter fundraising is over $80,000.

WOW.

I think good things lay ahead.
Maybe my dream of touring with Five Iron can still be realized.

Even if it cannot... there is joy in my heart... and I have been listening to FIF all day.
Welcome back friends... we missed you while you were gone.

Here is to another 8 years of new music and with you back in our lives!

Christmas Albums... that will make you happy

2011-11-22T10:58:00.001-05:00

It's come to my attention that people trust and enjoy when I give music recommendations.
(because someone said, I trust and enjoy your tastes in music)
So as the holidays are mere days away... and B101 has already started playing nothing but Holiday tunes, (the same 12-15 over and over again.. because no one ever puts out new holiday music)

I will share some of my favorites... of the season.

The holidays are a wonderful time and we all have wonderful memories of past Christmas.

If you anything like me, many of the fond memories involve the Music of the season.
(and food... lets be honest)

Hard to believe but I did not grow up in a musical family... but honestly my parents rarely had music on. Once I knew how to use the CD player, I was the one who was always pushing play.

However, the holidays were a different time.
My father would pull out the vinyl records and get them ready, get out the disc cleaner and meticulously clean all the Christmas Cd's.
He loves Christmas Music.
I can go buy him an album I really like and it may take him weeks to listen to it.
If I buy him a new Christmas album in July... he will have it on that very day.
*Quick story- Hannah and I borrowed his car a few weeks ago, to go to Massachusetts. I hit the Cd button to see what he had in and Mannheim Steamroller Christmas started playing. I started to laugh and Hannah said, I knew your dad and I had a special bond. she has been listening to Christmas music for weeks now)

One of the vinyls I remember waiting to hear... getting so excited over was...

Christmas with the Chipmunks would get my brother and I in a frenzy.
listening to it now still makes me smile... I have memories of decorating our old farmhouse with my grandparents, icing cookies in various shapes and setting up the

TRAIN YARD!

Another beautiful Christmas album I adored while growing up and I remember buying on cassette in the KOP mall (at the old Christian Bookstore) is

This is chocked full of beautifully arranged Christmas music with the

Nashville Symphony Orchestra and Boys Choir backing up Mr. MWS.

Now for more recent albums I really enjoy.

Diana Krall put out this album a few years ago and it is one Hannah and I thoroughly enjoy.

Her sultry voice and the jazz feel just makes the house feel warm around the holidays.

While Bebo Norman is not in regular rotation I usually listen to, my mother-in-law bought this album, because it had the song the Rebel Jesus on it by, Jackson Browne.
This is one of my favorite Christmas album to date.
This is one that I listen to the most during the holidays. the arrangements are wonderful and any one who features a hammer dulcimer on their album rates high in my book.

Let me get this out upfront.

I do not think Affairs are Merry, but.... this album is very merry and really got a work out last year on my iPod. again this has a jazz feel to it and brings a warmth to the room.
You'll play this one a lot!

Honorable Mentions:

Carol of the Bells (single) by Gungor
(am trying to find a link for you all to download, stay tuned)

David Crowder*Band - oh for joy
(to new to include in the classics)

Phil Wickham - Songs for Christmas
(love phil's voice... when it sings Christmas Music... oh boy!)

Relient K - Let it Snow Baby, Let it Reindeer!
(soft spot in my heart for Relient K - fun and very energetic album)

So pick one or two, make your purchase and turn it up... you can only listen to Christmas music for so long, without getting strange looks.

Make memories and make music a part of them!

Why Are Christians Such Terrible Tippers?

2011-11-22T08:17:00.001-05:00

I thought this was interesting as I sarcastically mentioned something like this in my teaching the other week.

Found at: Jesus Needs New PR

Dear Worship Leader…It’s not your job to…

2011-11-21T13:36:00.001-05:00

I have great respect for Carlos Whittaker.

I enjoy the way he thinks and writes.
He posted this blog a week ago entitled...

Dear Worship Leader…It’s not your job to…

I thought it was worth linking to and sharing.
I am not sure I completely agree... but I need to let it simmer.
It is encouraging regardless.
(it is also way easier to write, or re-post words like this than actually live them out)

I AM NOT MOVING - Short Film - Occupy Wall Street

2011-11-18T14:23:00.001-05:00

Not much more to say

insecurities, frustrations and hopes

2011-11-16T11:23:00.001-05:00

This is gonna be a long one...

because I am gonna dump out some insecurities, frustrations and hopes.

Music.
I LOVE Music
ever since I was little I have always had a fondness for it.
I grew up listening to all sorts of different music.
Most of it has had serious impact on me and the way I listen, play or write.
(for specifics check out these past blogs about the topic - Part 1 & Part 2 )

As I have gotten older... my appreciation for music has changed... it changed a whole lot once I started to play the guitar and tried to learn some songs.

It continues to change... and has been changing even more since I have started to lead worship part time.
Bi-weekly I have the arduous task of picking songs that represent the church community I am in, where we are at and what I think will connect us to God.
It is something I do not take lightly.

I read a blog the other day entitled, Zombies, Wine & Christian Music -

by a musician I really look up.
After reading this, two things happened.
#1 I knew I needed to share it with a wider audience.
#2 I felt very small, frustrated, and untalented.

(this is not a post for everyone to comment, or text me and tell me how good I am...

seriously... it's not what i need)

Music moves me... and I would say...very differently than many people.

I connect with a song on so many different levels as I am someone who writes lyrics and loves words. As well as someone who loves the instrumentation part of it all.

I feel insignificant when it comes to writing words.

(which is why I tend to re-write the music to other peoples words)

I listen to certain music specifically the David Crowder's Music, Seryn and Gungor and just long for the ability to write music with such depth and lyrical thought.

I get very frustrated when I try to think through writing the music itself.

I feel untalented and elementary.

I feel I am a creative person.

(my co-workers at church would agree with that based off, of the amount of emails I send with new ideas)

But my music creativity is lacking.

I think a major reason for that is time.

Time to practice.

Time to think it through and play through ideas.

Time to just be with my instrument and map out a song. (mine or someone elses)

Part of this is because I gave up on Music as a major in college, so it doesn't come very easy to me.

I rely heavily on memorization of a song...

to become comfortable with it...

before I can take it somewhere new.

I guess it boils down to this.

I cringe at much of what Christian Music and Church Music has to offer.

I think it is basic, boring and lacks creativity.

I hear albums by the bands above and think, now this is the stuff I want to listen to,

this renews my faith in Jesus music, and I think makes God very happy.

Then I grab my guitar and start to write out a song....

I play my 3 chords, add the relative minor in for (or four) good measure and...

never finish the song, because it's me on a guitar plugging away at 4 chords.

There is nothing new, exciting or creative about it.

You may already be thinking this... and I think it often...
I hear the line in mt head... as long as it is written with a pure heart and a mind focused on God, God approves and is happy with your worship.

well.... good for God, but I still think it SUCKS!

Zombies, Wine & Christian Music - thoughts from Michael Gungor

2011-11-16T10:54:00.001-05:00

So I admit starting off a blog with a picture of a good looking man, man cause you to pause..
However I find pictures make blogs more interesting to read.
I am not goign to say much, but that the above picture if Michael Gungor of the band, Gungor.

You may have heard of them through my incessant ramblings about them and their new album - Ghosts Upon the Earth
Anyway, Michael just wrote something for his blog that I found very interesting, thought-provoking and worth sharing.

I will most likely bring this up again and blog about it... but I haven't fully wrapped my head around it and the feelings I have tied up with all of it.

So until then... do yourself a favor and please read his blog... entitled
Zombies, Wine & Christian Music

it is on the long side...

but all very important to those who listen to Christian Music or are at all involved in

Music at their church.

Christmas "Deals"

2011-11-14T20:28:00.000-05:00

I posted this a few years ago... no one really cared, maybe now as the holiday season is upon us it may strike a new chord.

As Christmas nears I thought it was time to reflect and draw notice to a few things.

Soon we will be inundated with emails, commercials, and advertisements about the extreme IMPORTANCE of the holiday and season. Not for the actual reasons it is important, but for the consumeristic reasons.

We will also be reminded about various groups and organizations who will have a hard Christmas or might not get a Christmas at all this year.

The bell ringers will be out on corners, toys for tots, Operation Christmas Child and the list goes on and on…. and is almost as long as those in line for that new

(insert awesome must-have product here)

We will also be reminded about the soldiers who are and have given their lives fighting for us and the liberties and freedoms we so often forget.

As we go out and shop for deals on hot items or shop for the loved ones at home let us not forget those unseen.

No, No, not the soldiers wives, or families, though they are important... this isn’t about those families or groups, but it is about children and families of a different kind…

Let us remember those who make the gifts we are going to give.

I think often times at Christmas we like to actually believe the Santa story and that little elves make the toys because it makes us smile, feel nostalgic, and not have to be faced with the reality of who is actually making the gifts we are giving.

You see we don’t like to think about the fact that somewhere south of us or overseas there are adults and children working in horrible conditions making next to no money so we can give that gift and make someone smile.

They are sowing, screwing, soldering and painting so we can have a very Merry Christmas. Many of the people working these jobs are doing this because they want their children or siblings to be able to simply eat on Christmas day. (which will be a gift for them)

So as we spend somewhat unnecessarily this holiday season, let’s try to slow down and as we shop let’s put a face on the person or people who are making our gifts.

Look to see where that gift you’re purchasing was made.

What country did it come from?

Do you even know where that country is on the map?

(if your really going to dig deep and show love this holiday season maybe you could research that country…

Look at it’s poverty rate, it’s life expectancy, its illiteracy rate. Compare it to ours.)

But please try to realize that these gift makers are just like us, they just weren’t lucky enough to be born in the most wealthy and powerful nation in the world.

This holiday season may we try to be more aware and allow those unseen to have a happier holiday.

Remember - “we need to be the change we want to see in the world”

I did not originally pitch anything... but I think worth mentioning is something called the Alternative Gift Market. This is being hosted by my church this year.
For more information, check out the link...
Alternative Gift Market

Math that makes your head go... BOOM!

2011-11-11T08:00:00.001-05:00

So i am not sure if anyone else has watched any of Mr. WIlliam Tapley's video before. (better known as the Third Eagle of the Apocolypse, Prophet of the END Times.)

He has some great ones, but this one needed to be posted.

The month of November evil.

11-11-11 <-- an evil date.

11-9-11 <-- an evil date.

All bar codes.... everywhere... evil!

This one will make your head spin...
and you probably wont even be able to make it through the entire video.

Good luck... and Happy November!

Let the church say Amen!

2011-11-10T13:13:00.003-05:00

Stumbled across this song today while listening to other songs.
Really digging it.
(it reminds me of Chicago... I can hear my church out there singing this one)
(yet another reason to learn to play the piano)

Where is God when...

2011-11-07T10:47:00.000-05:00

*I wrote this last night late*

The question of where God is when... surfaced again this weekend.

We traveled to Massachusetts for one of my best friends from college's wedding.
I met this friend my first year at Eastern, on my first day at Eastern.
We were both transfers and our roomates weren't there yet.
He was in a room directly across from mine. His room was basically an extension of ours, because they were both so small. (take a room that was meant to be a single, with no A/C and cram 2 full grown men into it) It was a closet.
Anyway, because the hall had such small rooms, our hall was very tight (we still get together for superbowls every few years)
I remember my friend introducing himself or I introduced myself... and meeting his parents. His mother was wearing a smile the entire time.
His father a very firm handshake.
As the year progressed we grew closer and ended up causing a wide variety of trouble over the next two years. (We lived together in an apartment the next year, with two other friends)
I was taken out for meals by his parents. I stayed at his parents house in NH, one weekend and they are just a loving fun family.
He is one of the nicest people you will meet. Funny, and nows how to joke and pick on you, but in this loving way.
I could call him tomorrow and if something terrible happened and I needed him to be here, I have no doubt he would cut his honeymoon short. (he is like that)

About a year and a half ago, my other close friend, Frank (who has lived with him up until now) dropped the bomb that my friends father has been having health issues and they finaly figured out it was MS.
Wow.
What does that even mean.... life went on.
Hannah and I saw his parents a bout a year ago, where they had bought a house in Wayne to rehab and have their son and friends live in and rent out.
His Dad was carrying things, painting. Joking with us, asking us about the baby,
telling me the plans for the house.
Perfect health. No one would know.

Last night we saw him for the first time in a year.

He can no longer speak, and has no control of his jaw, and minimal head movement.
In normal settings he uses a MacBook to communicate.

1 year!

I sat there stunned.
I didn't know what to say to him, I didn't know what to do.

My friend has 3 younger siblings.
The MS has moved so fast... they do not know how long it will be.
I can't imagine losing my parents, let alone them be taken from me slowly in front of my very owns eyes.

I can't imagine not being able to hear my Dad say how proud he is of me on my wedding day.
I can't imagine not being able to tell my son on his wedding, great job, how proud I am and how much I love him.

It's one of these times that I think it is ok to swear at God

and as politely as possible ask him,

What the F@&%!?

Stress Vomit (or when things don't go your way)

2011-11-06T21:52:00.001-05:00

For some odd reason... I was scrolling through my old posts last week, mostly looking at when I really started blogging and what I was writing about. During that waste of time, I came across this post entitled, God, I SUCK.

Where I mention not having enough time to sit down and be with God and listen and how I kind of gave him a time slot to meet me and he did and... he is awesome, but I suck... etc etc... blah blah.

Well... with that blog freshly in my mind, I decided to try it again and test God. (can he do it twice, lets tune in and find out... I am pretty sure there is scripture about this, but... how often do we actually listen to scripture.)

Ironically when I wrote that last post i had yet to have a baby so me complaining about lack of time then seems downright hilarious now.

I have been quite on the ball with praying through, deciding and working out my worship sets. (some times 2 sets/weeks a head... awesome)

Whats the big deal you say, its Sunday... you have a whole 5-7 days.

Here is what is going through my mind... and I am thinking if I lay it all out I'll feel better and maybe figure something out.

Just got back from a semi-stressful weekend away for a wedding. (6 hour drive with a 8month old, who currently is NOT wanting to nurse)

Wife feels terrible, is tired, stressed and having other issues.

Tomorrow is Monday where I head back to my full-time job, to a very large project that was given to me as a challenge, without any real direction. (on a very bad week)

Tuesday night - meetings from 5pm-10:30pm - where more work will be givien to me. (1st meeting I am in charge of)

Thursday night prep for Sunday. (2hours after getting done work)

Saturday - leaves, grass, other household duties.

Sunday - worship, I also TEACH/co-teach (for the 1st time ever @ my church)

- two new people on the team, one is a piano player and we have not had a piano player in 3 years.

- Prayer for the Persecuted Church

- Lead Pastor Away (more work before church starts on Sunday)

I was trying to "get ahead" for Sunday so I can focus on the teaching part and practice it and nail it down.

GOD was supposed to show up tonight...because I carved out an hour for Him to do so.

Doesn't he know he is ruining my plans?

HoeDown Set for Sunday, October 30th

2011-11-03T09:39:00.000-04:00

That's right... in true Kurt form... I pushed some more boundaries and we had a good ole fashion hoedown during worship on Sunday.

I had this idea a few months ago and finally could line everything up. It was a ruckus. (for the most part)

Amazing Grace (started out slow - then got rowty) right into

Joyful Joyful (with Awake My Soul Interlude after 2nd & 4th verses)

That Where I Am (Mullins)

-Welcome-

That Where I Am (verse 4 and chorus)

I'll Fly Away

-E&O's (announcements)

-Teaching: Who We Are: Community of Grace

Amazing Grace (Verse 1 & 3)

I don't always include the band set-up but I have to this week.

Joe - Drums

Dave - Bass / Audio

Matt - Electric & Acoustic

Josh - Slide Guitar & Banjo

Kurt - Acoustic & Mandolin

Dawn - Vocals and Tamboreen

Julie - Vocals & Shaker

It was just an absolute blast to have fun, be loud and praise God.

*sidenote... I saw the David Crowder*Band perform later that night and they to did a hoedown breakout. I'm not sure whose was better.

Why Are we keeping Joy as a Secret?

2011-10-31T08:40:00.000-04:00

So after getting into an argument the other day (on facebook) a facebook friend posted this very interesting and slightly humbling video.
Penn Gillette (half of Penn & Teller) a staunch atheist, talks about getting a gift of a bible.

Thoughts?

a music secret I have kept... until now

2011-10-28T11:35:00.003-04:00

so I have been a bit musically selfish for a few months.
this is very unlike me, but... the time has come after seeing this video.
What you have below is a band chock full of extremely talented musicians, who play various things and make beautiful music.
Check out their other songs, On My Knees and We Will All Be Changed.
You won't regret it.

Introducing
Seryn

(keep an eye on the guy on the left, and how many different instruments he plays)

trusting is hard... and I want to see the plans...please - pt. 2

2011-10-27T11:26:00.003-04:00

Yesterday, I wrote about my long and somewhat unfortunate day on Tuesday. (you can read about it here ... if you want to know all of the gritty details.)

I realized it was getting long, so I cut it off.
I ended with the picture and phrase...

Are you there God?

It's days like that, that can throw you into a spiral. (it makes me wonder if Job was indeed a real person, how in the world did he respond the way he did)

Personally, I automatically go into, "I don't know how I'll pay for this, and that and its all 'important' stuff oh man, what do I do now?" I know in the back of my head I know God is in control, but relinquishing control is very hard. Trusting someone else is hard enough, let alone an entity or being that you can't see.

It's times like these I wish I could just be shown a small glimpse of the plans or blueprints that have my name attached to them, in the giant file cabinet in the sky.

Currently I am in a more relaxed state, but that is because both cars are currently running, we have heat in our house, and I get paid tomorrow. (from both jobs)
So I don't want to say I've completely given it up to God, because I have no doubt if one car still didn't work or I didn't have heat, or my pay check was another week off, I'd be in the fetal position under my desk at work... FREAKING OUT!

Now maybe... just maybe the timing of this worked out as such because I did pray, "God I don't know what the plan is, and I am not sure I like it, but that's about all I can say. I trust you."

Maybe.

And for now I am going to hold on to that and believe it. (but that is because my situation isn't as intense and dire as it was.)
I know plenty of people who have not been as lucky, whether it be with cars, or selling their cramped town home with 4 kids, or they've been without a job for months.

In this I count my blessings.

I prayed a prayer at dinner last night, that needed to be prayed:

"Dear God, thank you for this day, I'm not sure I thank you for the last 24-48 hours, but you know my thoughts on that.
God, I thank you for the food that is on this table, because we have food on our table, more than we need. I thank you for our beautiful child. I thank you that we have a house to live in and the jobs we both have. Not everyone is so lucky. Help me to remember that, help us to remember that... and help us to see the needs of others around us, who are less fortunate."

trusting is hard... and I want to see the plans...please

2011-10-26T14:07:00.003-04:00

so the last 24 hours (Monday 5pm - Tuesday 5pm) have been pretty sucky.

I took the day off from work yesterday for several reasons. The biggest reason was Hannah had appointments and the installer was coming to install our new coal stove. (that's right oil company, you wont be getting as much money out of me) The other reasons were to clean up around the house, rake leaves, work on a few odds and ends.

The phone call at 7am should have been the tip that today was going to be fun.

7am... the coal delivery people. (yes 7am) We will be there in 45mins.

ugggh.

Coal installer arrives. 10:30am

Hannah leaves. 11:20am

Installer (11:21am) we have a problem,(1st problem) and goes on to say we cant install because of where we want to, because of the window to the basement and he cant put this piece that close to the window. grrr

I call my Dad, we assess situation, prevent installer from leaving, and pushing this back to next week. We take apart window, close up window and now we can proceed.

(this took 2 hours from problem to actually fixing problem)

2nd problem- he is missing a piece of pipe. Guy from store bringing it.

Ok, sweet... lunch time.

hotdogs without buns. (FAIL)

I finally start on the stuff I wanted to accomplish while having the day off. (about 10-15mins of work with a picture in photoshop and then putting that picture into iMovie for church.)

Picture fixed, open iPhoto to import.

Nothing. iPhoto doesn't open.

Call apple. 45mins (disconnected)

Call again, have to download updates.(30mins)

Updates downloading.

Interuption from installer. Problem 3. I need 6in more of this one pipe. Cant finish it today. Gotta come back tomorrow.

He leaves.

Updates done, open iphoto. No pictures. All my pictures are gone.

I have a small freak out. (8months of pictures of august, gone... hannah will have a break down)

I call apple again. (15mins)

They fix it.

As he is giving me my case # and all of that. I finish my movie. (it was that quick)

Mechanic calls. (because my car randomly started leaking fluids... and that is never a good thing.)

Power Steering issue.

Eventually, need to replace the steering. $700-800 dollars.

BAM.

words to help, but if they don't...

2011-10-26T11:57:00.000-04:00

When life has got you down,
lift your eyes to the sky.

When life has caused you anguish and pain,
sleep in the wings of grace.

When hoping for hope, no longer works
rest in promise that all will be made right.

And when words like these do not prevail,
speak no words,
but fall to your knees.... and simply...
listen.

stuck in this dance

2011-10-21T13:33:00.003-04:00

I've been stuck in this dance as of late.
It's a dance I am sure many of us have been stuck in and get stuck in more than once.
It's the whole treasure here, treasure up there dance.

I have written before about the nagging feeling of if I just had X, then finally that would make me happy.
then I get X and next thing you know, X.2 is needed to make me happy and complete.

the word - ENOUGH - seems to be an ever-shifting word.

Almost a year ago now, we bought a house.
It was a great purchase and we absolutely love it. The move was needed.
The pluses to this move were many:
Our living area doesn't smell like smoke anymore.
We have twice the counter space...(which if you saw what we have now, you could do the math and be appalled at what we had.)
August has a room. (our dining room in the apt, would have been rough)
I have a place for all my music equipment.
It is great.

(our house the day we settled)

But along with buying a house... comes with it this sense of wanting to make it yours and making it look nice & comfy.
I have been turned on to some blogs about home remodeling by our best friends,(who also have a kickass blog about their home... read it.) so I frequent these awesome DIYers and dream.
I see this kitchen being redone, and that space over-hauled with the right accessories and I love it.
I really love it.

There are many things I would like to do in our house, but current funds and life haven't allowed it.
Now there are many things in the house we have done, but kind of hidden.
Immediate needs such as an alternate main heating source was needed.
Boarding up and insulating a giant hole in the foundation that froze a pipe last year, building a coal bin for our alternate heating source, all sorts of electrical work, that was old and didn't allow us to really plug anything in.
Not to mention the plumbing issues we had last year.

But I go through this dance with these issues of guilt over my american privilege and consumeristic nature.
I want a nice house with nice things and while I have heard many people tell me, there is nothing wrong with that, but part of me has to question that and then the guilt kicks in.

Do I need that beautiful kitchen?
Do I need that cube wall of bookshelves so I can have all our stuff neatly displayed and my vinyl record player up and running.
Do I need those lights on the porch that would really the front of the house pop on warm spring nights and cool fall evenings?
Do I need all of that stuff and this stuff I currently have because...
it ain't coming with me when I go.

Is my home supposed to look nice and make people go wow... or is my home meant to feel like home, inviting, relaxing and loving when people walk in?

Can I have both?
Can I have all this nice stuff, feel good, have my house be loving and sleep well at night as I do not tithe enough or give to those who need water, while I "need" cube bookshelves to display my CRAP?

Time To Get Political

2011-10-20T15:07:00.001-04:00

Christ for President - song

(video is not exciting... actually non-existent)

but I love and have loved the song for awhile.

I kind of want to do this at church at some point.... would that fly?

I am sure there will be more to come on my political views... as this nonsense drags on and more "Christian" groups get involved. But the above picture states my choice for 2012.

So, what do you do?

2011-10-19T22:20:00.000-04:00

So, what do you do... when you look out and your community/congregation (I hate that last word) and they are just staring at you....and not just for one song, but for almost all the songs.... and it is an all worship music/creative worship Sunday?

So, what do you do when you are slightly charismatic and your church is not?

So, what do you do when you want to yell at everyone they better start clapping or else your gonna come down there and make them?

So, what do you do when people just do not connect with Music the same way you do?

So, what do you do when all these questions are running through your head while you are leading worship?

When you've found your calling.... but

2011-10-18T11:10:00.002-04:00

I am sure I am not alone in my current state of mind.
Does anyone else feel like they know their calling, and can see it so clearly... but the stars have not yet aligned? They seem to be so close, but there is this one pesky star that refuses to line up.
That's where I am currently, at this exact moment in time.
I sit in a chair everyday and do this job to pay bills to provide and to keep August & Hannah warm, but I am not at home.

I like the people I work with... if I didn't I think i'd be somewhere else, trying to make more money or not driving as far, but I do like the people and the work is somewhat rewarding.However, my passion, my calling is in front of me... and several times a month I can touch it I am doing it... I am in it... but... then Monday comes.

Hebrews talks about patience -
Hebrews 10: 36 Patient endurance is what you need now, so you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that he has promised.

and I am completely aware of the irony of being impatient with a God who is constantly patient with me. (Grace is a wonderful thing)

But it'sone of these instances currently where anyone could quote me a thousand bibleverses about God's perfect plan and resting in that... and all I will hearis... blah, blah, blah. .... while thinking, I wish He(God) woudl just hurryup.

He hasbeen so wonderful over ths last year and provided such amazing things, andthereare so many people that would simply take any job, that me liking my jobseems like a selfish request.

-KDF

Pastor's Wife chooses Honesty over... decency?

2011-10-18T08:12:00.004-04:00

Now I will admit that they set this up... but.... she could have avoided it.
I knew what she was going to say, but I kept hoping she wouldn't say it...

Found at Christian Nightmares

Conquer the Night

2011-10-17T09:52:00.000-04:00

Friday night I had the extreme privilege of leading worship @Eastern University, for an event they have each semester called, Conquer the Night.
It is an Worship music and Prayer event that runs from 10pm until 6am. (literally conquering the night)
It's broken up in hour sets per worship leader/band. We got the wonderful 11p,-12am hour.(this is my fave hour for this)
I had forgotten how much I love this event.
It is held in the dinning commons... described is.... minimal thin carpet, high vaulted wood ceilings and windows. It is a wonderfully loud room.
There are no monitors so you just play of of what you hear bouncing around the room. there is no stage, you are just on the floor... level with everyone. (you run your own sound)... and most everything is run through your own personal amps.
For a seasoned musician this sound like a pain in the neck and just a terrible set-up, but you have to play in it to feel the vibe.

Imagine a room, filled with 80-100 College students who came specifically to sing and praise God, and again it is a LOUD room.
It was awesome. I just felt this energy and connection... that is missing on most Sundays, when I am on stage and the closest person is 10-15 feet away from me, separated by height and monitors.

We practiced a lot for this event, (because we needed to, we rarely play an hours worth of music) and it paid off. We actually bled this set into Sundays set as we had an all worship/creative Sunday... which I will post about that idea... soon.

Here is the Set we played:

Audio - A Winding & Troubled Road - excerpt from A Bitter Sweet Providence, by John Piper. with background music by the Joy Eternal
Music Build in F - immediately following audio

Come On (My Soul) - in E- Rend Collective Experience
God is so Good (African Version) - in E
How Deep the Fathers Love for Us - in E
Chorus to Beautiful - (just the ooo's) - in E

Audio - Our Worship
All Creatures (Crowder Version) - in D
Show Me Your Glory - Jesus Culture - in D

Audio - the Celebration Wedding - by Bradley Hathaway
Beautiful - Phil Wickham - in C

Call and Response Prayer
**How He Loves - John Mark McMillan - in C

** we were supposed to do to other songs here, We Fall Down and You Won't Relent, but we were low on time and I pulled an audible. It worked out better this way.

Boundaries

2011-10-13T11:52:00.001-04:00

I was at a breakfast meeting a few Saturdays ago and the person I was meeting with said something very important, and telling... of my life at this current moment.

This isn't an exact quote.

"When you are passionate about something, it is easy to lose yourself in it. It is easy to just do one more thing, or just this quick email. While you have a family waiting to spend time with you. Just be careful and set boundaries." (again loosely quoted)

This week I failed miserably at this.
I knew what was coming up this week, so Sunday I stayed home and slept in. When August got up, we brought him into bed with us and wrestled a little and just enjoyed being home.
This was the smartest thing I did all week.
Sunday night I put August to bed, I hugged him, kissed him and said, "I love you buddy, I'll see you Wednesday night!"

Yes. 69 hours from that moment.
I wasn't going to be traveling, I wasn't going to a conference, I was just living life.
I am also out Friday night, and most of the day Sunday.

Is that really living life?
Shame on me.

In my mind I try to justify it.
"well this week is special because we had a practice we had to have Monday, then Tuesday I don't normally have back to back meetings. Friday night, well that's a special thing with playing music."

This comes back to passion. I am passionate about music so that's why I chose that, I am passionate about Valley View so that's why I had double meetings.
But this calls into question... am I passionate for my family?
or am I passionate enough for my family?

From the looks of this week, an outsider would have a different answer than the simple, "of course" I have in my mind.

How do I set boundaries, and stick to them?

Hell Houses... Nightmares

2011-10-06T15:02:00.000-04:00

I found this video over at AmericanJesus.net
and after watching and reading their blog I knew I needed to re-post in full.
The below is a post from Zack Hunt

I’ve said before and I’ll say it again: I am not a fan of so-called “hell houses” or “Christian haunted houses.”

I’m not interested in scaring people into heaven, if that’s even possible.

So when the guy in this video says “Most people think we’re crazy for putting on The Nightmare…..Then again most people don’t think they can change the world,” I’ve got to take issue with what he’s implying.

He is right that people are capable of world changing action even if they don’t realize it. However, “scaring the hell out of people” doesn’t change the world.

Forcing people to watch graphic scenes of rape, murder, drunk driving deaths, and gang violence isn’t evangelism. It’s pornography.

Obviously, it’s not the sexual stuff we usually associate with porn, but as Merriam-Webster’s defines it, pornography is “the depiction of acts in a sensational manner so as to arouse a quick intense emotional reaction.”

Jesus calls his follower t0 “go and make disciples”, not pander to their baser instincts in order to a) scare them into an emotionally charged, unreflected decision and then b) get them coming back for more.

What this church, and countless other churches, evoke is really no different than the reaction somebody gets from watching “regular porn.” It’s exciting, it’s stimulating, it gets your emotions revved up…..and then its over.

Just like “regular porn” this sort of thing gets people addicted, but once the high runs out and the things that once got them stimulated finally go stale, then Jesus gets boring, the faith becomes irrelevant, and people move on to the next high.

Hell houses don’t change the world.

Neither do scare tactics.

If you really want to change the world, and you should because there are plenty of people in desperate need of help, then befriend the widow who lives next door who’s too frail to mow her lawn or drive to a doctor’s appointment. Reach out to your co-worker that’s going through crisis and doesn’t know where to turn. Donate your money to one of the countless charities trying to end the famines which claim tens of thousands of children every month. Donate your time to your local soup kitchen or food pantry, they always need volunteers. Next time don’t ignore the beggar on the street, but instead find a way to offer them hope and healing. Or simply learn to love and care for your neighbor, even your enemy, as if the fate of the world depended on it…..because it does.

Loving people changes the world. Hell houses don’t.

The church doesn’t need porn to win people to Jesus. It needs people bold enough to embody love, grace, forgiveness, and hope to a world that would rather have porn.

Grace and peace,

Zack Hunt

how hearts soften...

2011-10-05T11:36:00.000-04:00

The posting below is an email I wrote to a friend of mine. In regards to him telling me his girlfriend was pregnant again.
I felt I need to share it as it is something I have been struggling with the last few weeks and I feel like i do not reveal too much of his life and happenings.

M,

I felt I should explain my lack of reaction to your greatnews.
I’ll be very open and upfront in this email… and I feel like I can be that withyou.

I watched your excitement via email last year about you going to be father. Iam sure some moments were quite frightening as well, as it is daunting, to bein charge of a life.
I too was going through all those feelings as well. Shocked,confused… excited, scared.

I also remember talking to you and reading emails from you pissed off, andsuper upset over ---- falling away and ultimately the decision she made withoutincluding you. I also remember going home that day and sharing withHannah all that had happened and her bursting into tears.
I remember thinking how does one get over that, how does one forgive someone ofthat.

Fast forward to February 28^th.
This was the most amazing day of my life. I saw something I had only seenon screens and read about. Seeing it is completely different, andeveryone says that and you do not understand it until you go through it.
I sawthis precious, innocent human being come out of my wife.
And I immediately love him.
There is no other point in our life like this.
As you grow up you learnto love your parents, and siblings. You learn to love close friends, you growclose to a girlfriend and fall in love over time.
When you see the baby for the first time, immediately your heart feels bigger. You instantly love this thing… this being you helped create.

Its hard to explain.

I have pictures at work of him and I stare at them and long to be home with himand hold him and make him smile. (His smile melts my heart.)
I love to roughhouse with him already and hear his laugh… as a musician Ilove music and sound. I make music and sounds to impact people. His laughter isone of the best sounds I have ever heard. And when he is calm and just sits on the couch with my arm wrapped around him,there is no other place I would rather be.

All of this is I guess to explain to you that I love August so much and I can’timagine my life without him.

It pains me to think of what was taken from you… and what was taken from thatchild. (Honesty)
I know you both have been given another chance and you are both giving each other another chance.
And honestly that isawesome, (and actually biblical... which I know you don't really care about... but just realizing you are more forgiving then me the church goer) and I hope, oh god how I hope for you that everything goes well and you get toexperience the amazing life of being a father.
It sucks sometimes to be honest, because I am selfish and I want my freedom.
I want things the way they were where we could just watch movies all day oneSaturday, where we could sleep in, where we could stay out.
But you see your child asleep at night or they smile at you and thatselfishness fades.
(That is a key… I’ll tip you off to… selfishness must fade… in yourrelationship with her and the child… or it will NEVER work)

That is why I didn’t comment.
I wasn’t ready for that yet.
I couldn’t explain my sadness and frustration withyou like I can at this point.

Blessings my friend.

Catch Up

2011-09-27T14:54:00.001-04:00

So, somehow over the last few weeks I have been completely ignoring this blog.
There has been a lot to comment on, and say, but I have not been feeling like sharing.
Fall has started and with that brings all sorts of extra business.
It is amazing how my wife out one night a week throws everything off and makes the week seem much more hectic.

Some snippets worth mentioning over the last few weeks.

September 8th-10th I got to get away for a few days with the pastoral staff from VV.

(its still weird & humbling to think I am considered pastoral staff)
This was a great weekend, with beautiful views, it was a great time to think through the fall, connect and laugh a lot.

On September 20th - Gungor's Ghosts Upon the Earth - album released. Tearing up the charts on itunes.
After listening to this for a solid week many times, I still feel inadequate at reviewing or even typing thoughts about this album. Simply put, it is one of the most beautiful, simple yet complex albums I have ever had the privilege of listening to. It is an emotional journey. One I highly recommend, like this: "if you only have money to buy one more album this year, buy this album!"

On September 21st - my brother turned 24. (i'd like to say we celebrated his birthday wonderfully, but alas we did not.) He is a great kid, but is more like my parents that they or him know in regards to communication and presence.

On September 22nd - I organized a few people and started practicing some music. Kind of forming a small band, but trying not to call it that as I do not want anyone to be offended, by them not being in it, and knowing those currently in it, will continue to changes as we move along.
So for right now I am calling it the Collective.
*i was reminded this night how hard it is to start something new and to actually practice songs.*

On September 23rd - we had dinner with one of my old college roommates I have not seen since may. We had a great dinner, and watched an amazing documentary, Darius Goes West. (check it out here) I would love to show this at Valley View sometime.

Also he showed up with his old iPad, that night and GAVE it to me. NO strings attached.

*now this may seem like no big deal, but as my wife would tell you, i have wanted one of these since they came out. I have been slightly obsessed. I had saved up a good chunk of money several times, but plumbing issues arose, a tree needed to be cut down, and the muffler got a hole in it and made me sound like a Harley Davidson. Which is ok, but not in beat up old Civic. (plus you couldn't hear anything or anyone it was so loud)

So I am pretty darn excited about this gift and humbled by his generosity.

And on September 27th - I am realizing that this month will be over in a few days.
My son will be 7months old in less than 24 hours.
Time flies by. I am trying to hold on, but its hard.

(August & My Dad)

Thanks for taking some of that precious time to read these ramblings.

Even more thanks if you actually care.

History of Christian Rock

2011-09-20T13:25:00.004-04:00

This looks really interesting.

Worship Set for Sunday September 4th

2011-09-15T20:13:00.002-04:00

This post is linked to a wonderful website - the worship community where many worship leaders posts there setlists, ideas and confessions for other worship leaders to see. Check out - Sunday Setlists at theworshipcommunity.com.

So the first set was a little tricky of me... I intertwined songs and jumped back and forth.

Hallelujah, What A Savior (Verse 1, Chorus, Verse 2, Chorus) - into
You Won't Relent - Jesus Culture (sung by Matt)
Hallelujah, What A Savior (Verse 3, Chorus) - into
I Could Sing of Your Love Forever - Delirious (Chorus)
-Welcome-
-E&O's- (Announcements)
-Teaching-
-the Lords Table- intro
How Deep the fathers Love For Us
-Eat & Drink-
I Could Sing of Your Love Forever

all in all I think it went rather well. We had a full team.
2 female vocalists
2 male vocalists
2 Acoustic guitars
1 electric guitar
1 bass player
1 drummer
1 percussionist
(Matt also played bells in addition to leading a song... talented man that Matt)

It was a very full team, even though the church was not that full. I has actually been sitting on this one since the week before, but Irene and her precipitation and wind changed things.

I love when songs work together and seamlessly blend, it make singing more exciting and I think connected.

Now onto September 11th... been working hard on this one. This one proves to be even trickier to navigate through.

Worship Plan for September 11th, 2011

2011-09-15T20:10:00.003-04:00

This post is linked to a wonderful website - the worship community where many worship leaders posts there setlists, ideas and confessions for other worship leaders to see. Check out -

Sunday Setlists at theworshipcommunity.com.

How can you be reflective and creative without towing the line on cheesy and overtly American, on a day that is very important in American History?
We need to continually remember that God comes before country.
I worked hard to make this happen on Sunday. I knew we needed to reflect on what happened ten years ago, but it should not change what we did that greatly.

Oddly enough with the storm a few weeks ago, the teachings got moved around and Matt would be teaching on Life with Jesus, Loving others... wow.

I decided we needed to take a Lamentful approach.
Looking for Songs of sorrow is way harder than it should be, but that is for another post i have been working on.

I Need Thee Every Hour
O God, Where Are You Now (by Sufjan Stevens - but the crowder version - which is a little safer)
-Reflections and Responsive Prayer
- the responsive prayer was written by Jimmy Orr and found on engageworship.com
- Moment of Silence for Reflection
You Hold Me Now
-Welcome Time
- E & O's
Teaching - Life According To Jesus
How He Loves

Jesus... what are you doing to that child?

2011-09-12T13:09:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure who thought this sculpture up or why my place of work thought it was ok to be in the main lobby, but... it raises some serious questions in my mind.
Crazy Catholics!

the Wizard of Oz movie is the Debil!

2011-09-08T15:36:00.001-04:00

For someone who think this Movie is the devil... he has it down pat.
I think... the take away form this is there are midgets in the movie. And according to him we all laugh at midgets.

<iframe width="420" height="345" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/7Q5vSrD9C80" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Midgets!

originally seen on The American Jesus

This is what I am talking about!

2011-09-06T14:05:00.002-04:00

This video sums up some of the thoughts I've been having.

the Veil

2011-08-29T11:08:00.001-04:00

I continue to be awe'd by word bending and metaphor David Crowder uses.

There are the ones currently owning me, from The Veil:

O please tears stay
Where you remain
Do not fall
Do not fall
Something greater
Is on the way
Just hang on
Try to hang on
Try to hang on

The love of angels
Becomes the love of men
O heavenly light
Takes on a earth and skin

one of the best mornings of my life

2011-08-24T06:55:00.008-04:00

August (my 6month old son) doesn't sleep well. By that I mean at 6months he is still up at least 3 times a night, and that is on a good night. I was worried about our upcoming vacation for several reasons.
#1 the last time we went away from home and took him out of his element, he was up like 7 times that night and awake screaming from 4am-5:30am, in a hotel.
#2 he would be sleeping in the same room with us. Now while this gives my wife wonderful goosebumps to know he is so close... I know what this means.
it means we will hear every whimper, it means he will hear every movement and the chances of him ending up in bed with us during the night just went up 95%.

So far halfway through our trip he has done reasonably well. He is still up his normal 3-4times a night, but that's normal. (for him)
He has ended up in our bed more than he should have, but after staying up way too late, getting too much sun and the family making too glasses of margaritas and sangria, sometimes you have to bite the bullet.

This morning he decided that when he awoke at 5am, he was not going to simply fall back asleep.
We tried.
I finally gave up and got myself ready to walk the boardwalk. I begrudgingly found shoes, found the keys to the house, the key to the car for the stroller, his hoodie, my hoodie, my ipod, his monkey, his pacifier and strap to keep it on him, my pacifier... ooops.

We headed out and to the boardwalk, as we hit the boards, I realized how cloudless it was and beautiful it was already at 5:30am.
We walked and walked, then walked back, then finally at 13th street we sat and watched.

This is one of the best mornings of my life.

I know he will never remember this, but
I
will
ALWAYS
remember this morning.

Wow... somebody loves you

2011-08-23T21:22:00.002-04:00

I am on vacation this week and supposed to be fasting from Media, but this was too good to ignore.

It is even funnier if you have been drinking some delicious Carolina Sweet Tea.

enjoy.

Music... I am looking forward to...

2011-08-19T13:41:00.009-04:00

In keeping with my most recent post... I knew this one had to be written.
There has not been a fall of music releases like this in quite sometime.

I'm gonna break my bank.
Here are the ones I am most looking forward to...
(in order of release dates)

Wilco - the Whole Love : August 31st
I fell in love with Wilco back on Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, which is still my favorite and I think their best. (i talk about its impact on me here) Sky Blue Sky is 2nd behind YHF. Looking forward to what Jeff Tweedy and the crew are up to. Jeff is an amazing musician and lyricist. He has inspired many of my songs.

Gungor - Ghosts Upon the Earth : Sept 20th
This is the album I am most looking forward to. After stumbling upon them the end of last summer (due to the David Crowder Church Music Conference) I cant get enough. Their beautiful things album gets better with every listen, and their live shows.... well go see them! (here is a link to the album teaser - I write about it here)

Feist - Metals : October 4th

if I am honest this is the album I am least likely to run out and buy, but I will still get it as I am interested to see what happens/ has happened with Miss Feist after 5 years. (yes it has been that long since the Reminder and her break out song. 1234) We have high hopes.

David Crowder Band - oh for joy! : October 4th
there have been many rumors flying around that this is the last album.
There have also been rumors flying around that this is the second to last album.
Either way the David Crowder*Band will cease to exist around the 1st of 2012.
Regardless, I know this album of Christmas Tunes, will prove to be exciting, inventive and one of the best Christmas albums ever.... (I'm calling it) I will not be ashamed to be blaring Christmas tunes in my car on the way home from the store on October 4th. Bring on the Holiday!

Mute Math - Odd Soul : October 4th
if you haven't heard of Mute Math... may God have mercy on your soul. Stop reading and go watch this video.
Seriously, watch it now. This VIDEO.
Wait... what... did they perform the whole video in reverse... pretty much live... YES!
One of the best live bands I have ever seen. You leave the show exhausted because it is so high energy.
I had a friend go with us last time and two night earlier he saw U2 live. The MuteMath show ended and he said, they made U2 look silly. I would have rather paid $95 dollars for tickets tonight.
(go you tube mute math live)
I am sure this album will again leave my mouth open trying to find words for what just happened to my ears.

Coldplay - MYLO XYLOTO : Oct 28th
This has been a long awaited album.
Does Coldplay have way to much hype for their album releases... yes
Do they usually promote too many singles... yes
Do their albums ever disappoint... NO.
(side note I live how they have been matching their stage attire and stage props to match album cover feels)
I think this will again produce some great singles and be a go to album.
I also think they will again clean house at the Grammys. (they beat out U2 the other year... I mean WTC?

mark the calendars... and save some allowance money.
Your gonna need it this fall.
Any albums you all are looking forward to?

destined to be a worship leader

2011-08-19T08:18:00.000-04:00

he is destined to be a worship leader!

Music... I am currently....

2011-08-17T09:36:00.007-04:00

I thought it was time to post about some music I am currently enjoying. (that I own)

In no particular order:

Imogen Heap: Propeller Seeds (Single)
You must listen to it with headphones... I am a huge fan of imogen and her new take on recording is very exciting... and means great music sooner! (Learn about it here)

Ascend the Hill: Hymns - Take the World but Give Me Jesus
stumbled upon these guys not too long ago via you tube and found out the had a free hymns album!
Don't mind if I do. They take these hymns somewhere very special. (Download it for free here!)

the Civil Wars - Barton Hallow
i had heard there single before seeing them live. I was interested, but could take them or leave them... then I saw them live. Wow. I knew I needed this album. The harmonies that these two pull off seamlessly, are just incredible. Go see them live if you get the chance. (are they playing near you?)

Mat Kearney - Young Love
Mat has been popping up on my radar for years. I hear something, I like it, then I forget about it.

Such a shame. (you've probably heard some of his song too.. .like this one)
However, I downloaded this album after hearing his new single, Hey Mama.
There is a lot going on, on this album, and it is all good.

The first several tracks could all be college radio singles. He is a talented man.

Enjoy the music.
Maybe there is something new in here that will make your life, or at least a drive a little better.

Gungor - Ghosts Upon the Earth

2011-08-15T10:54:00.002-04:00

To say that I am excited about this album, may be a slight under statement. Slight....

I am going out on a limb... and calling it...

One of the Best Albums of the Year

Worship for Sunday 8/14

2011-08-15T09:07:00.004-04:00

This post is linked to a wonderful website - theworshipcommunity.com where many worship leaders posts there setlists, ideas and confessions for other worship leaders to see. Check out - Sunday

Setlists at theworshipcommunity.com.

Sharing of my current struggle with suffering in Africa. (see prior post)
Lighting of the Trinity Candle
Silence
I Surrender All
How Great thou Art
-Greeting-
Teaching - Life: According to Jesus
The Lords Table
Great is Thy Faithfulness
Beautiful - Wickham (through verse 3)
Eat and Drink
Beautiful Wickham (verse 3 and 4 with alternate ending)

I had struggled this week with the songs i had picked out... which lead me to write a downer of an email. I prayed a little and just started playing the guitar and praying and just started playing I surrender all... realizing the start of this frustration and hurt was where I needed to surrender. From there How Great Thou Art started to come out and I just felt this calming sense that this is where we needed to go.

Practice was very calming and during the song Beautiful we really just connected with it and got to worship in practice. It was a very moving time.

the team consisted of, 3 female vocalist, 1 male (me),1 acoustic guitar, 1 electric guitar, bass drums... and it all flowed very well.

Thanks to all who were involved and to Deb's sister who really shared some encouraging words with me during the greeting.

i am not sure... (how worship relates to Africa)

2011-08-11T14:52:00.004-04:00

The below is the note/email I sent out to the worship team in preparation for this weeks worship.
I realized after sending it that i needed to post it.

This weeks worship has been a struggle for me and I am not yet totally satisfied… as the week has worn on I am trying to figure out how I plan/design worship on Sunday while there is such tremendous suffering in Africa. I’ve been watching the news and reading about the terrible things that are happening. I have seen women holding babies the same age as my baby … but these babies are not filled with the same life and smiles as August… these babies are simply working to breath to stay alive.
In my heart and mind I am trying to figure out how to wrap my head around these disturbing images as I plan to sing about the glory of God and his goodness.

One author that has had a tremendous impact on my life shares this story in his book: "Two guys are talking to each other, and one of them says he has a question for God. He wants to ask why God allows all of this poverty and war and suffering to exist in this world. And his friend says, 'Well, why don't you ask?' The fellow shakes his head and says he is scared. When his friend asks why, he mutters, 'I'm scared God will ask me the same question.' "
I know this but I don’t know what to do.
I am not sure how I relate this and change my behavior so I am not so scared to ask this question of God. I am not sure how to pick songs or pray for suffering like this, suffering that seems to never end.
I am not sure how to look my neighbor in the face and answer his question about why I go to church and worship a God that lets this happen.
I am not sure how our voices raised to God praising him for the things he has given us compete with hundreds of thousands of parents in Africa cry over their dead and dying children.
I am not sure how I sing in an Air conditioned building, with lights, and fancy slides, and glance down at my beautiful son in his mothers arms staring back at me knowing that if I was born in Somalia he may be one of the images we saw on our screen this week.

I’m sorry this is a pretty big downer… but I am going to need some prayer this week and weekend to make sure I am hearing the voice of God I need to hear… in order to make this weeks worship pleasing to him in relation to the world around us.

Praying Hands - Engage Worship

2011-08-11T09:08:00.005-04:00

In my readings of Worship Leader Magazine the website, Engage Worship, popped out several times.
Engage offers some great tools to help worship leaders as they plan for Sundays. They have a great section called Worship Ideas. This section is where a few different people submit ideas they have put into practice in their own churches, and want to share with others in hope to make worship creative, exciting and dare I say... engaging.
I've used a few ideas form them in the last year and expect to use more.

Check out the most recent idea posted... it is one I am particularly fond of.

Engage Worship - Worship Ideas

Enjoy.

My current (Music) struggle

2011-08-10T14:13:00.003-04:00

Since getting back into leading worship on a regular basis I have been listening to more and more “Jesus Music.” I have always been very picky about it… and still am. (I do not listen to most of the normal mainstream stuff… save for one or two artist)

What happens when you listen to a lot of music you potentially want to play and teach… is you get frustrated . (maybe it is only me)

I get frustrated for several reasons.
The first is my current abilities on guitar… some of this stems from not having the time I really want/need to practice these songs with a different style. I know I can be better and the few things I have practiced for some songs we have done have ended up being fun and sound good.

Now this next one is something that is always has been and always will be an internal struggle.
Do we let God move through practices and worship and know he is praised regardless of how we sound? or
Do we or should we practice more to polish it and make it sound good. (meaning we want to do our best for God)

I am currently in the state of wanting and desiring more time to practice and really make these songs our own and sound good. Part of my make-up is a musician I get caught up in well practiced music and find it easier to worship. (the more I practice this happens to… it comes with being comfortable with the songs)
On the opposite side of that, I personally struggle to worship in church when I am not playing… especially if things are not going smoothly.(I have gotten much better at this… but I still struggle)

So how do I move to make worship sound better and more polished… slightly better arrangements… and full, without sounding like a performance?
How do I make this happen when I do not have the time, which clearly means other people do not have the time for extra practices? (I have always liked that we do not have a mid-week practice, but I can see the usefulness of it on some Sundays)

I also know that from practicing with a band… that everyone improves and the music takes on different dimensions the more you practice. You get comfortable with the basics then start to add things.

I guess I am longing for a better connection to the music we playing, to make it our own and own it, to be different and diverse.

I welcome suggestions, agreements or disagreements and prayer as I try to figure out what to do. I have an idea… but don’t know that it will go over well.

TRACES

2011-08-08T10:31:00.000-04:00

So I hate to admit this, but my wife and I have gotten sucked into watching/taping America's Got Talent. (that is until only singing acts are left... I can watch 15 other shows for that)

This group Traces is not in the contest, but was a perfoming act... and blew my mind.

Knowing what little I know about dance... because my wife is a dancer... I was just amazed at the talent and sheer physical shape of these people.

(ignore the first 30-60seconds of AGT BS, but the rest.... it will blow your mind.

The American Jesus

2011-08-04T13:26:00.004-04:00

not much to say

plucked from The American Jesus

Dustin Tavella

2011-08-04T09:22:00.000-04:00

I don't usually post music videos to this blog... as I have never felt that, that was the purpose of this blog... however... today is August 4th and in honor of it being 4 years today since i married the best girl ever... I am breaking tradition.

so... Dustin Tavella. I met Dustin in highschool through a mutual friend... and Dustin has randomly popped up throughout the years in my life. I remember his band winning a battle of bands years ago...and seeing Dustin move, interact with the crowd and actually steal the microphone from John Reuben... I knew it was just a matter of time.
Dustin is on the verge of breaking through with a pretty tight Pop/R&B/Hip-hop album. This is one of the 1st singles of of the album. I am very excited for Dustin and hope he can truly share his talents with the world.
As you will see in the video (he doesn't take himself to seriously)

We Got the Summer

*i'm hoping to get him to play at VVCC soon.